One of the constant refrains I hear from those starting out in business, whether that is an internet marketing business or a ‘bricks and mortar’ business is, “I lack confidence”. Let’s explore that because your personal growth and development matter. Confidence, according the Merriam-Webster dictionary is ‘the feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something” and is connected to trust, belief, conviction and reliance. Confidence is not a natural trait. We have to work at it and strengthen it over time. Our confidence, for example in dealing with others is developed through the practice of conversation, such as listening to the flow of a conversation before speaking and preparing questions before entering into a conversation. Fear is another factor when it comes to strengthening confidence. Fear holds people back from a situation and often leads to anxiety, and the anxiety leads to self-doubt and then moves to a lack of confidence. Understanding the causes of the fear and dealing with it provides the assurance that people have nothing to fear “but fear itself” a phrase popularized by Franklin D. Roosevelt. We can also gain a sense of confidence by achieving certain accomplishments, such as meeting goals we have set, and thereby building our belief in our capabilities and competence. Let’s take a look at three broad areas that will help improve confidence: what you can do daily, how you can strengthen your mental muscle and the importance of your spiritual muscle in building confidence. 1. Improve Confidence Daily We can strengthen our confidence by handling the ‘emotional outcome’ we face on a daily basis. How do we do that? By acknowledging our emotions including those we have difficulty with, learning how to speak up for ourselves, limiting self-criticism, and accepting the genuine complements we receive from others. We need to be aware as well, that confidence is not all encompassing. Sometimes it is like being on a roller coaster. We can have confidence in some aspects of our lives yet experience low confidence in others, for instance one can be confident in driving a vehicle but have little confidence in developing a website. When we deal with these ups and downs, we needn’t spend time honing those areas where we are confident but strengthening our weak ones through practice and application. 2. Improve Mental Toughness Another way to improve confidence is by strengthening our mental toughness. We can do this by:
3. Strengthen Spiritual Toughness There is one more way to improve confidence and that is going beyond business, work and life. It is having a sense of confidence in someone beyond ourselves within the elixir of faith and hope. In order to find this type of confidence we go deep within ourselves and discover that we are part of something or someone bigger than ourselves. It is a place where we suspend our ego and touch a bit of the Divine within us. It is through faith and hope that our rush to accomplish is put into perspective; that things outside of our control are actually in control if we listen deeply; that the world is a good place and that we have a place within it to make it better for others and for ourselves as we conduct our business, work and life. In conclusion you can strengthen your confidence by dealing with emotional fallout; discovering what is holding you back from going ahead and overcoming it; strengthening your mental and spiritual muscles by regularly taking stock of where you are at and actualizing the suggestions noted above one at a time on a daily basis. Thank you for reading and please stay safe, keep well, and continue becoming the best version of yourself, Richard Fontanie
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